How I managed to prevent a mariticide and uxoricide (Google it) this Christmas

On Christmas Day an old school friend wrote me an email that he is thinking about murdering his wife. The funny thing was, his wife, also my friend, wrote me an almost identical email at the same time. They were both on their iPhones.

I wrote back:

“You are both feeling like killing each other. Stop it right now, it is Christmas and you love each other, really. I know, trust me, I am a doctor (and a long life friend). Have a Gin and Tonic! And calm down!”

I sent it to both of them. It worked. They phoned me, on a speakerphone, laughing. Crisis over.

I told them to try to pay me back when it’s me crying in my kitchen next Christmas Eve. Like every year.

Why does Christmas do this to us?

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4 thoughts on “How I managed to prevent a mariticide and uxoricide (Google it) this Christmas

    1. I don’t know about arson. But it was funny to remind them by email that they both feel like killing each other and tell them to stop. They listened! Should I become a marriage counselor?

      Like

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